


Crack

by Angel_Negra



Category: Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Muppet Show
Genre: Comedy, Crack, Gen, Secret third fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-17
Updated: 2011-02-17
Packaged: 2017-10-15 17:56:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/163375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angel_Negra/pseuds/Angel_Negra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All it takes is one egg and everything cracks up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crack

**Author's Note:**

> Every muppet character here has existed either on the Muppet Show, Sesame Street or Fraggle Rock.

It started when Lord Lothar sent down the chicken monster, with Sweetums and the Clodhoppers to back it up. They were destroying the warehouse district in Angel Grove when the Rangers arrived.

"Hold it right there!" shouted Kermit as he stopped in the street in front of them.

"You know, any time you boys want to turn over a new leaf for lovely moi, that would be magnifique," Piggy said, batting her eyes at them.

"Yeah, it'd be crate!" said Fozzy with a chuckle. "Get it? Great, crate...?"

"We need more cannons for this," said Gonzo.

"Animal smash! Animal smash!" snarled Animal.

Sweetums snarled and charged. Piggy let out a yell and karate chopped three Clodhoppers with one blow. "It's Morphin' Time!" called Kermit.

"Raaaa, Tyrannosaaarus!"

"Pterodactyl!"

"Triceratops!"

"Sabertooth Tiger!"

"Mastodon!"

"Dragonzord!"

Then the chicken popped out an egg and the world exploded.

*

Adam woke up in the Command Centre. He groaned and sat up slowly. Rubbing at his aching head, he peered around slowly. There was a tall, orange trash man staring at him worriedly. Adam blinked slowly in confusion. "Uh, hello?"

The trash man nodded and walked over to a large, glowing trash can where Zordon's tube should have been. The guy banged on the lid hard. There was some cursing and yelling from inside and a muffled, "I'm busy!"

The trash man sighed heavily and banged on the lid again.

The lid whipped open and out popped a green, furry... monster, wearing a towel around its waist and a shower cap on its head. "What?!"

The trash man pointed at Adam insistently. The monster peered at him. "Oh, so you're finally awake, are you?"

Adam blinked again. But the green monster in the shower cap was still there. "Yes?"

The monster glared at the trash man. "You told me he wasn't broken," it snapped. "Do I have to run all the scans myself around here, Bruno?"

Bruno cleared his throat and said, "Well, uh-"

"Signal the other Rangers and scan this guy's head again. I'm going to finish my shower."

"Um," said Adam, sitting up a bit more. "I'm sorry, but, who are you?"

"Oscar of Grouch," snapped Oscar. "Mentor of the Power Rangers, and protector of Earth. And in the middle of my shower!" He dropped back into the trash can, slamming the lid behind him.

Adam met Bruno's gaze. "Can I get that scan now, please?"

*

"I have no idea how this happened," said Gonzo, studying the scan's results. "I mean, sure, it's connected to the egg."

"It's a shell of a problem," Fozzy said brightly. He elbowed Adam's side. "Get it?"

Adam gave him a weak smile.

Piggy sighed heavily and hopped up onto the console. She started buffing her nails. "I do feel bad for you, kid," she said to Adam. "No other Pink Ranger could ever compare with a beauty like mine. At least before, you never knew what you were missing, but now? You'll be feeling the lack forever more. Isn't that right, Kermie?"

"Hm?" said Kermit distractedly. He looked up from the scans. "Oh, yes. Of course, Piggy."

The lid on the trash can suddenly slammed back. Adam jumped as Oscar popped up, some how looking dirtier than before his shower. "All right, does any one know what's going on or are you all just wandering around like clueless weirdoes?" he snapped.

Adam looked over at Fozzy. "Zordon is nothing like that," he said.

"Really?" Fozzy tilted his head curiously. "Is he orange?"

"Well, actually, he's kind of blue. But. He's a head in a tube-"

"But how does he feed his pets? Does he keep fish in there?"

"What? I.. don't think Zordon's ever had pets. He was trapped in a pocket dimension by Rita Repulsa-"

"Sounds like how Grundgetta trapped me in this trash can," grumbled Oscar. "And then that creep Lothar showed up. Ugh, it's almost enough to put me off my spaghetti ice cream."

Adam blinked in incomprehension again. He was doing that a lot. "Are they married too?"

"Eeeww." Piggy shuddered. "Who wants to think about that?"

"Sorry," said Adam with an apologetic smile. "I'm just noticing some similarities between your world and mine."

"Oh? Do you guys run a variety show too?" asked Fozzy curiously.

"Actually, we're still in high school."

"Hrm," said Kermit, scrunching up his mouth. "Were you at least fighting a giant chicken too?"

Adam poked at his fuzzy memory for a moment. "I think so," he said slowly. "Things are still a little blurry."

"Oh!" Gonzo exclaimed. "Maybe if we shot him out of a canon!"

Adam wasn't sure where to start in refusing that one. He opened his mouth to give it a try when there was a loud crunching from one of the consoles. He and the rest of the Rangers turned.

"Hey!" snapped Oscar. "Stop that! Bad Animal!"

Animal stopped chewing on the side of the console and whine. "Hungry..."

"Hrm," said Kermit, scrunching his nose up again. "Maybe we should bring everyone down to the Juice Bar. A change of scenery might help Adam here."

"And we can feed the beast before he shuts down the teleporter again," said Piggy drily.

"I could eat," said Adam, eyeing Gonzo nervously.

*

The Juice Bar looked exactly the same from the outside, though Adam didn't exactly pause to do a complete casing of the building. Still, he wasn't sure if he should be relieved or worried at how similar it all was. It would be nice to see Ernie, but he didn't know what that would mean for his situation. He was trying to jog his memory when they walked up to the bar.

Then he noticed the brown dog behind the counter and stumbled. Only Fozzy's quick reflexes saved them both from crashing into a table.

"Hi de ho, Rolf!" Kermit greeted cheerfully.

"Hey guys," said Rolf. "What'll it be today?"

"Something filling for Animal before he tries to eat the punching bag," said Piggy, tugging Animal's leash just as he made a leap for the railing. He landed on the ground on all fours, then stood up, panting slightly. "Banana shakes for the Bear and the Weirdo, something green for my darling Kermie and I'll have a strawberry shake." She batted her eyes at him. Then she glanced at Adam. "Oh yeah. And whatever the new guy wants." She jerked her thumb at Adam.

Rolf looked Adam up and down curiously. "What'll it be kid?"

"Uh," Adam had a moment of on the spot panic. He couldn't remember what he usually got. "A blueberry shake?"

Piggy snorted. "Get him a burger and some fries too. Maybe if we feed him, it'll get the hamster running at the wheel."

Rolf gave Adam an inquisitive look. Adam nodded. It really might help. "All right, coming right up. Oh hey Kermit, I gotta new flavour of fly shake if you want. Horsefly."

"Oh, I'l have that."

They settled around one of the tables near the training area. Adam peered around curiously. There were still humans. And then there were... things that looked human, but more fuzzy and a lot shorter, and animals and... well, monsters. No one seemed to find this strange at all. They were all interacting as if this was a normal day for them.

Rolf started lining their shakes up on the counter. Fozzy and Gonzo got up to get them, but Gonzo veered off at the last second. He made his way over to a chicken that had just entered the bar. Adam turned in his chair for a better look at the chicken.

At first he though it was a talking chicken, but he could hear nothing but clucking along with Gonzo's murmurs. Then he saw two old men in suits walk in together. They watched Gonzo talk up the chicken for a moment, then shared a look and walked toward the bar, snickering.

"So, Adam," said Piggy sweetly. "Is anything coming back to you?" She patted his arm. "I know it must be hard, having to remember women who can't possibly compare to moi, but surely there's something?"

Adam shrugged helplessly. "It's pretty similar, but it's also very different. I still there might be a connection with the chicken, but I don't know if it was the power of suggestion or if I'm actually remembering that."

"Well, just give it some time," said Kermit easily. "We just got here and well, so did you."

"Shakes are up!" Fozzy said. He plunked five glasses onto the table.

"Foood!" shouted Animal and he leapt for the table, crashing into the glasses and sending milkshake every where.

"And shakes are down!" jeered one of the old men.

"About as fast as the ratings when the Bear tries to be funny," said the other one. They both cracked up.

"My clothes! My hair!" shrieked Piggy.

Animal looked up from the centre of the table, dripping milkshake. "Sorry," he said sheepishly.

"Uh, Rolf?" said Kermit, sighing. "We're going to need to borrow your mop."

"Bet this kind of thing doesn't happen where you come from, huh?" Fozzy asked Adam.

"Well, kind of. It's not usually me and my friends who wind up getting messy."

*

"You could always sleep on my couch," offered Fozzy as Adam sat still for yet another scan.

"Thanks," said Adam, smiling.

The sirens started wailing. Bruno rushed over to a console and started pushing buttons. He stared at the results and then started banging on Oscar's trash can. "I'm coming! I'm coming!" Oscar snapped at the lid flipped back. He held up a grubby piece of paper. "Okay, we've got an attack on the city."

"What's going on, Oscar?" asked Kermit.

"Well, get your butts over to the Viewing Globe so I can show you."

Adam gathered with the others as the Viewing Globe lit up. There was a large, fat monster smashing cars in the business centre of the city. It looked like a hairy ape.

"That's Gorg Junior," said Oscar. "He's known for super strength, and that nose of his can sniff out anything. I'd also avoid getting sat on, and watch out for the feet. He likes to stomp things, people, Fraggles."

"...What's a Fraggle?" Adam asked Fozzy.

Fozzy shrugged. "Something that Gorg Junior stomps?" he offered.

"Well?" snapped Oscar. "Get out there already!" Bruno turned to look at him and Oscar sighed heavily. "Be careful. Don't die. And don't do anything stupid," he added in monotone.

"Thanks, Oscar," said Kermit warmly. "You're a nice guy."

Oscar glared at him. "Quit insulting me and get moving already!"

"All right, guys! It's Morphing Time!"

"Tyyyrannosauuurus!"

"Pterodactyl!"

"Triceratops!"

"Sabertooth Tiger!"

"Mastodon!"

"Dragonzord!"

The teleporter landed them a few feet behind Gorg Junior. They spread out, dropping into ready stance. "Okay, Gorg Junior!" said Kermit. "No more destroying the city for you!"

"Don't worry," Fozzy whispered to Adam. "I'm sure it's going to be just like fighting with your team."

Gorg Junior turned around and snarled at them. "I don't think so," he snarled. A bunch of blue monsters in red shoes appeared from out of nowhere and charged them. Gorg Junior roared at the Rangers and charged.

Animal roared back and took a running leap. He wrapped himself around Gorg Junior's head, pulled his power sword out and started swinging wildly. Adam hesitated, distracted by the sight. "...I can safely say that Rocky's never done that," he said.

A blue monster kicked him in the stomach and Adam staggered back. He blocked the next kick and punched it in the face. "Hiiiyeah!" Adam quickly ducked as Piggy knocked three blue monsters flying.

Adam punched another monster and then swept its feet out from under it. "Power Axe!" He slashed into a monster, knocking it back.

Gorg Junior gripped Animal's belt, ripped him off his face and flung Animal into the side of a building. Animal landed on the ground with a crash, scaring a couple of chickens into fleeing the scene, clucking frantically.

"Camilla!" Gonzo's voice was laced with fear. "You're going to pay for that one," he said to Gorg Junior. "Power Lance!" He raised it with a loud battle cry and charged.

Gorg Junior could barely block the rapid slashes. He slowly backed up, trying to get a shot in. A blue monster jumped at Adam, but Animal landed on its back, smashing it into the ground. Animal looked up, his uniform dirty and sparking a bit. "Hii," he said.

With a triumphant cry, Gonzo slashed Gorg Junior hard across the chest. The monster stumbled and fell back.

"Okay, guys!" called Kermit. "Let's bring 'em together!"

Adam grinned. At least some things never changed. "Power Axe!"

"Power Bow!"

"Power Lance!"

"Power Daggers!"

"Power Swoooord!" Animal leapt up and brought the Power Blaster up to firing position. "Fiiiire!" The energy beams shot out and Gorg Junior went down in an explosion.

Then there was a loud rushing of wind and a large shadow spread out over them. "Finally!" rumbled Gorg Junior. "You're stomping size!"

"Look out!" shouted Kermit as a large foot came down. They all scattered. "Bruno! We need Dino Zord Power now!" There was an affirmative beep over the comms. Kermit lifted his Dragon Dagger and began playing the call song for the Dragonzord.

The rest of the Zords rolled onto the scene and Adam leapt into the Mastodon's cockpit. Everything looked normal. "Adam here, ready to go!"

"Gonzo here, ready to kick this chicken scaring jerk's butt!"

"Fozzy online, let's wacka this wacka!"

"Animal ready!"

"Piggy online. This pig's ready to fly!"

"Okay, guys!" said Kermit. "Bring the Megazord together and we'll take him out."

Adam activated his Power coin and slotted the crystal into the right port. He shifted into position for the Tank Mode. The Mastodon shuddered and the control panel lit up, Adam's cockpit rotated into place, bringing him up along side the other Rangers. Animal wiggled in his seat and pumped a fist. "Go!" he shouted.

Gorg Junior grabbed a chunk of building and threw it at them. "Everybody brace!" shouted Gonzo.

The Megazord rocked violently and Piggy's console sparked slightly. "Battle Mode! Battle Mode! Rawr!" Animal ordered, bouncing in place. He nearly fell out of his seat when the Megazord rocked again.

"We can't, moron!" snapped Piggy. "This giant freak's throwing more rocks!"

"Don't worry Piggy," said Kermit over the comm. "I'll distract him!"

The Dragonzord roared and charged Gorg Junior, spinning at the last second and whipping the monster in the face with its tail. Gorg Junior stumbled back with a yell. He dropped the rock he was holding on his foot and started hopping around in pain.

"Battle! Mode!" cried Animal, slamming his hands on the buttons with a wild laugh.

The gears whined as the Megazord slid upright and locked into place. "Megazord is a go," said Adam, pulling up shields and power outputs.

"Charge!" shouted Animal.

The Megazord stepped into battle. They threw a left at Gorg Junior's face. He dodged to the side and hit them in the torso. "Evasive manoeuvres!" cried Gonzo.

"Watch out for the bananas!" said Fozzy.

"What bananas?" Adam said in confusion. The Megazord slid and alarms started ringing. He clung to his console and jabbed at his diagnostics.

"There's always bananas," said Piggy in annoyance. "The trash heap doesn't care who goes down as long as she gets the scraps."

Gorg Junior laughed and charged at them. Dragonzord roared and fired its finger missiles, driving him back.

"Punch! Punch!" shouted Animal.

They drove the Megazord forward and feinted a blow to Gorg's face. He blocked it, dodging to the side and they slammed a fist into his chest. He staggered back, panting hard.

Animal wriggled in his seat and flung his head back. "Pooowerr Swoooord!" he called gleefully.

The Power Sword came flying down from the sky. They grabbed the handle and spun it in the charging circle. The consoles lit up with maximum charge and they slashed down hard. Gorg Junior let out a final cry of rage and exploded into a shower of light and sparkles.

"That's for Camilla, you evil creep!" Gonzo said triumphantly.

*

They gathered in the Command Centre afterwards. Oscar glared out at all of them, crossing his arms. "Well, you're all still alive. What more you do want?"

"Erm," said Kermit, scrunching up his mouth and glancing at the rest of the team first. "We were wondering if you'd found out anything about Adam's predicament."

Oscar stared at him incredulously. "It's only been half an hour! And most of that was in dealing with Gorg Junior!" He flung his hands up in exasperation. "What is this, a kids' show?"

"Oh, erm."

Oscar pointed to the door. "Go home!"

They went home. Well, Adam found himself at Fozzy's place. It was a nice little cave, very warm and cozy. Fozzy gave him a bright grin. "You can sleep on the couch," he said, pointing to the well patched couch by the television. "It pulls out into a bed."

"Thanks," said Adam. He was distracted for a minute by the electrical sockets laid into the stone walls.

"Just don't mind Stalter and Waldorf," he said. "Mom likes having them over for dinner from time to time, but she's away for the week."

"Okay." Adam nodded, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

It wound up being a few days before Oscar finally called them back in with the solution to Adam's problem.

*

Adam paused to take a drink of water.

"Well don't stop there!" said Kira, leaning forward. "What happened next?"

Adam looked around at the rest of the team. Tori and Xander nodded, and Bridge even put his slice of toast down to lean forward curiously.

"Well," he said with a shrug. "It gets a little weird at this part."

"Gets?" Tori said drily, raising an eyebrow at him.

Adam snorted, because yeah, okay. "Turns out, the whole thing was the fault of this Japanese guy with a magenta camera."

"What?" said Kira blankly.

"Well, it turns out that both my Ranger team on this Earth and the Ranger team on that Earth were both fighting a chicken monster at the same time. And they both dropped eggs that should have exploded when cracked. This guy was just passing through at the wrong time and the energies wound up switching me with their Black Ranger."

"So, how did you get back?" asked Bridge.

"The Japanese guy, calls himself a Kamen Rider, travels through dimensions a lot. He gave me a ride home and brought the other Black Ranger back to his Earth."

Kira shook her head slowly. "You're totally messing with us, aren't you. Doctor O would totally have mentioned this before," she said.

"There are other dimensions out there," said Xander, raising a finger.

Adam nodded. "He did take a picture for us," he said, pulling it out of his wallet. He held up a picture of him and the other Ranger team, grouped together, helmets off and smiling. He held it out to them. "See?"

"Wow," said Kira, peering at it. "You have such nineties hair."

"Hey!"

End


End file.
